Don’t Impose on My Romance

Given the backlash I got for the threesome in Consent, this post is particularly important to me. And I’m not going to stay quiet about how much it hurt anymore. There are real people behind the judgments.

11 thoughts on “Don’t Impose on My Romance

  • I thought that scene in Consent was beautiful. I just don’t get why people would get upset by it at all. But then, I guess I can be rather unconventional in my mind. Still, what the people within said relationship do is between them. Period. The end. It doesn’t matter if I would or would not do the same thing in my own relationship.

    • Thank you! I may end up writing more on this subject in the future. Because it’s bothered me for nearly a year now how the conversation unfolded.

  • In my mind there is nothing wrong with your threesome in “Consent” – nor in any other threesomes where ‘consent’ is shared and respected. So, poof to those who complained. And Alex had it right in his blog: it’s nobody else’s business.

  • AJ, you’re already aware of my thoughts on the imagined ‘threesome’ in Consent. 😉 Every time we try to have a reasonable discussion, whether on GR or Facebook, it unfortunately gets hi-jacked…so, to re-iterate, what someone does in the privacy of their own home or wherever, is entirely up to them and NO-ONE else’s business. PERIOD. How people want to conduct their relationship is down to them, and nosy/curious people should butt out of things that don’t concern them and are NOTHING to do with them cos as long as it’s consensual, who is being hurt??

  • That blog post is very straight forward and on point. I thought you handled the situation around Consent (even before the book was out) very gracefully even when it got nasty. (I’m also one of the readers that had no problem with that scene.) You can choose whether or not to read a book for whatever reason you want, but berating and abusing an author and/or their work for not writing a fictional characters’ relationship the way you would conduct your own relationship is something I just don’t understand, especially from the m/m community.

  • I wrote a while book about a very loving threesome. I consider it perfectly natural. And I support anyone else in exploring this territory, in literature or in life.

  • I can’t see why any one would have a problem with the consent threesome or any ones else for that matter. The one in consent was one of the best I have ever read. And if all parties involved are in agreement then who are we to pass judgement.

  • Consenting adults doing adultsy stuff? None of my damn business. If they all agree on it, and it works for them, who am I to judge?

  • I probably don’t need to type these words because I’ve said them before and you know how I feel. For what it’s worth here’s what I think.
    1. Every author has the right to write what they want/need (and yes, I hate that combo too) to write, just as every reader has the right to read or not read whatever they want. Readers DO NOT have the right to decide for the author what should and should not happen in the books they write nor to go on a witch hunt just because a story line doesn’t live up to the fantasy they’ve build in their own mind.
    2. Everybody has the right to live their own life in the way that brings them the most satisfaction (with a few, in my mind rather obvious exceptions such as paedophiles/ serial killers). Nobody other than those involved have a right to make a judgement about how other people want to live their lives, love their loves or identify themselves.
    3. People (in general) should stop and think before they speak/type. Words that are just an innocent afterthought to the speaker may be incredibly hurtful to an unexpected reader/listener. If we all try to be aware of that, a lot of pain and despair would be avoided.
    4. (and I know I really do not have to say this to you). Please never stop writing the stories the way you feel they should be written. The honesty and integrity in your writing is one of the elements that make your stories so very special.

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